Sarah got to reunite with her bio sister Sunday and we had a great day. She brought her a few more pictures and a few things like some of her mom’s necklaces and a couple of rings. She is doing really good over all, but she is having some struggles a long the way. So many triggers. A shirt she was wearing in a picture or a necklace that she remembered her mom wearing when something happened.
She is also saying things that didn’t happen like a conversation that they had texting on my phone and I went back and read the messages and it didn’t happen so she is day dreaming about different things and can’t separate what happened and what hasn’t.
I am proud of her even though she has became defiant at times after a few hours she has come to me and talked to me about what was going on. It is very important for me to stay focused and even if I am about to pull my hair out because she won’t do what she is told that when she wants to talk I need to take a deep breath and take time to listen and help her process her triggers.
If this had of been a few years ago she would be raging. She is so amazing! This is a young lady that had no remorse and no empathy and now she concerned about hurting my feelings as she grieves for her birth mom. In some ways her mom’s death has helped her to love me even more. She has called me her “real” mom several times now. There’s no longer that feeling inside of her that feels like she is betraying her mom for loving me.
Never ever lose hope for your child……..We almost gave up a few times on her. God always showed me that we weren’t supposed to give up. I am so glad that we didn’t give up.
I know this sounds weird but you don’t get anywhere when you give up. You get to the point yourself where everyone that is involved your either disappointing people involved indirectly or directly. So you’ve done the right thing not giving up and sometimes that’s the hardest thing to do. Take it from somebody who knows how that is. Because I have thought about giving up so many times but I haven’t gave up yet. Your friend, Jon Craft.
You are exactly right we can’t give up but unfortunately with the children we are raising many are forced to because their families are in danger and some states they have to turn their kids over to the state in order to get them help and then they face charges but yet if their child hurts another child then they can be charged with failure to protect and lose all of their kids. So I don’t pass judgement on the parents that have to find another place for their children yet at the same time I know 3 out of 4 of our kids with RAD has healed so there is hope …… I am so glad that you haven’t given up and you are trying to make a difference with so many things……..