Forgiveness is a big word……even bigger when we have to act upon it. I learned years ago as a teenager to forgive those that have done wrong to me even if they don’t ask for it. Forgiveness doesn’t help the person that we forgive. It helps us.
I am thankful that I was reminded last night at church about forgiveness. Matthew 18: 21 – 22 says Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.
WHAT?????? 70 times 7???? Let’s see that would be 490 times …….In most situations you would never have someone to wrong you that many times. So what Jesus was getting at is that we are to forgive them over and over. As I was typing this I realized that I couldn’t say that our kids couldn’t wrong us that many times a day because they could LOL but it is important that we forgive them.
I understand that it’s easier said than done and for a preacher to tell us that when he has no clue about our lives many times we will just tune that part out. I am telling you this I know the life you are living and it can be anything but pleasant. When your child cusses you and hits you and breaks things day in and day out we feel that anger and hate creeping in our hearts. I’ve been there. Who would have thought I would have ever hated one of my kids, but I did. Our oldest daughter would just walk in the room in the morning and it would make me sick. She wanted to kill us and she was trying to hurt the other kids. She was mean…….during this time I wanted her to heal so even though she ripped her door off of it’s hinges I still took her in my arms and held her and I told her that I loved her over and over until I felt it….. I didn’t really hate her I just hated her behavior. Three years later she has healed a lot I know I’ve said this before but now I can see the love in her eyes. She treats me like she should instead of always trying to hurt me. Now what kind of relationship would we have if I hadn’t of forgiven her….. we probably wouldn’t …… This is why when our children are spewing venom at us we have to let it roll off of us and forgive them. I guess in the long run it helps them because it keeps us from sending them away. I do understand that sometimes our kids become so violent that we don’t have no other choice. We were to that point with our daughter. We have to put the safety of our families first, but even if we do have to place them somewhere else we need to forgive them.
If we don’t forgive then it won’t go away…..
Some of our children may not heal until after they grow up and move out and if we never forgave them we won’t be ready to accept them back into our lives. I know each of you love your kids. A LOT!!!! If you didn’t then you would have given up on them a long time ago. I watch and I read the post in the support groups and like us many people including family members think we love one child more than we love another one….. we don’t treat them fair. There is not a one of my kids that I love more than another. I don’t treat my kids fair and I never will. I treat my kids according to what they need to help them heal. These people more than likely aren’t going to come to us and say that they are sorry. Again we need to forgive them. Not for them but for us…………